Tag Archives: Not knowing

Your Recovered Life Series with Rev. Everett Alexander, PhD, Death Mid-Wife

Rev. Everett Alexander, PhD, Death Mid-Wife

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I have known Reverend Everett Alexander since the early days of my recovery. During that time, I’ve seen him walk through the good and bad with an admirable and unshakable dignity, grace, faith and humor. He has beaten ridiculous odds in terms of overcoming his addiction and living HIV positive for 30+ years. 

I’m excited to share this conversation where he shares how when faced with an unfulfilling career that ‘just dried up’ he used a technique (he now teaches others) to find his Heart’s Desire… Continue reading

Your Recovered Life Series with Tim Harrington, Intervention Specialist & Recovery Advocate

Tim Harrington, Intervention Specialist & Recovery Advocate

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Tim Harrington is fiercely committed to the world of recovery. He helps people get and stay sober – in whatever way works best for them AND takes daily actions aimed at reducing the shame and stigma of addiction.

The first time I saw Tim in action was at a big conference on addiction treatment. It was during a panel discussion that he raised his hand and asked a simple question.

He referenced how we, who understood addiction and treatment, were all there to learn more…but what about all the people ‘out there’ who weren’t in the know? Especially those whose lives addiction crashed into and who hadn’t a clue about the disease and even LESS about recovery. What if we had a conference for THOSE people? Continue reading

Question today, Know tomorrow

 

It’s okay not to know. I didn’t always believe this.

I was tortured by not knowing what my ‘thing’ was. What I was here to do. Tortured is a strong word – so let’s call it a consistent, low-grade fever. I thought that since I was asking the question, an answer ought to be forthcoming.

Watching TV I would kick myself for never getting those head shots. I would watch ER and think maybe I should be a doctor or a nurse and when the credits would roll, I’d think I just wasn’t applying myself. I was working in TV production but I wasn’t an Executive or Senior anything!

If I went to a street fair I’d walk by the crafts and question if I was supposed to be making custom window boxes? Decoupaged light plate covers? Hanging beaded candle-holders?

It was exhausting.

I had two successful careers. To the outside world it looked like I was doing great. But there was something missing. I hadn’t felt like I could really go the distance in either of them because, truthfully, I didn’t care enough. And it made me uncomfortable. Was I being lazy? Not giving it my all in a puritan work ethic kind of way? The answer was always, “No.” So then what was the problem?

I bought the books. “I Could Do Anything If Only I Knew What Is Was” – “Live The Life You Love” – “What Color Is Your Parachute?”…you get the picture.

But I never read them.

I would start but it just felt too overwhelming. It nearly always involved index cards. I was supposed to start with something I felt passionate about but didn’t have the guts to go after. Or didn’t think going after was a viable option.

I was screwed.

I didn’t know what my passion was.

Continue reading