It’s a hot Saturday night in Vegas and I am on my way to a bullsh*t cocktail reception – the start of a 3-day conference with a thousand people I don’t know – small talk and trying not to be shy. Not the best attitude to start this adventure with…
The day started with an easy flight, a great hotel, lunch with friends, body surfing in the pool (gotta love Vegas), and then a thrilling downpour complete with thunder and lightening. It had been FUN and filled with unexpected cool stuff happening yet here I was dreading what was coming next.
A presenter for the evening had written a book about drinking wine to unleash your creativity. When I had seen this listed in the events I thought, “Great, I don’t drink so what are you saying? That I can’t be as creative?”
I’m really building my case for this to suck, huh?
This is the video and transcript of his 2005 commencement speech at Stanford.
I watched it last night and cried. It touched me deeply.
Here are two quotes:
“You’ve got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don’t settle.”
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”
I could not agree with him more.
Day to day, I sometimes forget – so thanks for the reminder.
“Make a list – of things, experiences, feelings that you want to have – declare what you deserve. Think big and bold and sweet and simple – go for 100!”
How many things did you get on your list? If you didn’t do one and want to, go for it! We can wait…
Asking that question, I realized I hadn’t done this exercise in a while so I just did it. I got 100 things. It took about 10 minutes. Some repeats, some big goals and some simple sweet stuff. And wouldn’t you know, there were times when I had a mean little voice saying “Oh, really??? You deserve these things, huh? Who do you think you are?” Continue reading →
Recently, I was working with a client*, who was looking to bust a move – she wants change. She has a job she loves, amazing family and friends and contributes to those around her in a big way. AND she wants more money, more abundance, and more freedom.
We started exploring what that would look like. She recalled a period when she had nothing. It was the happiest time of her life.
I could hear it in her voice – the purity of that time.
Then I got one of those intuitive hits – and something felt off – I wondered if there was some sort of disconnect – or subconscious denial of self of having this life of wealth and abundance. After all, if she was the happiest when she had nothing, would having ‘it all’ mean that she would be unhappy?
So we dug a little deeper. What was holding her back from this life she so wanted? We were quiet and waited and then she heard the voice…“You don’t deserve it.” She nearly gasped.
I hereby grant Courtney Webster full permission to write whatever the hell she wants on this blog. I have heard her concerns about a distinct ‘voice’ with a consistent ‘theme’ or whatever other well-meaning suggestions/rules/BS she is hiding behind. Hasn’t she listened to herself?
Just. F**king. Write. It.
Listen, honey, the idea is to share what happens when you go for the life you love. A life that is bold and daring and courageous. Remember? A life beyond your wildest dreams? This is your life and your voice. Sure you are exposed but who cares? It’s just a blog!! And it’s part of this life experiment so whoever reads it gets to see what that looks like…so cut the BS and go for it! Stop taking yourself so seriously! Experiment! Have fun!! Write what you like! Share some cool stuff. Let’s see some songs and videos! Post your sweet heart out! See what happens…
Pep talk and ass-kicking over. I see my ride coming. Gotta go…
What permission do you want to grant yourself? Would love to hear about it!
It’s okay not to know. I didn’t always believe this.
I was tortured by not knowing what my ‘thing’ was. What I was here to do. Tortured is a strong word – so let’s call it a consistent, low-grade fever. I thought that since I was asking the question, an answer ought to be forthcoming.
Watching TV I would kick myself for never getting those head shots. I would watch ER and think maybe I should be a doctor or a nurse and when the credits would roll, I’d think I just wasn’t applying myself. I was working in TV production but I wasn’t an Executive or Senior anything!
If I went to a street fair I’d walk by the crafts and question if I was supposed to be making custom window boxes? Decoupaged light plate covers? Hanging beaded candle-holders?
It was exhausting.
I had two successful careers. To the outside world it looked like I was doing great. But there was something missing. I hadn’t felt like I could really go the distance in either of them because, truthfully, I didn’t care enough. And it made me uncomfortable. Was I being lazy? Not giving it my all in a puritan work ethic kind of way? The answer was always, “No.” So then what was the problem?
I bought the books. “I Could Do Anything If Only I Knew What Is Was” – “Live The Life You Love” – “What Color Is Your Parachute?”…you get the picture.
But I never read them.
I would start but it just felt too overwhelming. It nearly always involved index cards. I was supposed to start with something I felt passionate about but didn’t have the guts to go after. Or didn’t think going after was a viable option.